Unfortunate Scrutiny

A guy walking into Cafe Brazil last night had the misfortune of being seen and scrutinized by Becky and me.

Me: Oh weird.

Becky: Wassat?

Me: Check out that guy. He's carrying a bible. Is tonight bible study night or something? At look at that outfit!

Guy walked past and headed into the...

Me: Oh my god, did he just?

Becky: Yep. He just went into the women's restroom.

Me: Awesome.

Becky and I waited for several minutes without speaking so we can watch him when he exited the women's restroom.

Me: Holy shit!

Becky: I know! Brown sports coat, brown slacks, black button down shirt with no collar, and tennis shoes. And now he's got two books! What, did he shit a book? It must be the missing testament!"

Me: I'm afraid to go to the bathroom now. What if there are bible verses written all over the walls in his poo?

Becky: I think our table in hell just got a tablecloth.

*Edited to give sarcastic and mean credit where sarcastic and mean credit are due.