Actual Text Message Conversation

Apparently both the Fiendster and I had interesting shopping trips today.

FF: Oh. My.






Me: Invader Zim's Crack Cream! It's nature's AIDS!






FF: Crack cream and love dip. It's Saturday night in Oak Lawn! Yeehah! (Lasso and bullwhip not included.)

Me: Slather it on and saddle up!

FF: Send in 10 box tops and $12.95 and get a pair of Crack Cream chaps.

Me: You know way too much about the lives of gay men to be a lesbian. Ride 'em cowboys!

FF: I learned it by watching you, okay?!

Me: Somehow I'm not surprised. I keep dreaming of giant cucumber scarecrows. That probably fits in here somehow.

FF: With the love dip, of course.

Me: Ah yes. Love dip and crack cream. Another Tuesday night in the Smith house! Break out the cucumbers!

FF: This would be why CPS is after you.

Me: Yes, and why you and I are actually 14-year-old boys.

FF: Maturity if overrated.

Me: Ain't that the truth.