The Darkness

The darkness that I feel threatens to take me under. The light at the end of the tunnel grows more and more dim each day. The figurative noose that hangs before me beckons to me. I long for that sweet blissful ignorance that only sleep can bring yet I’m afraid that if I sleep I’ll forget. I don’t want to forget. But I don’t want to feel. I can’t decide which is more important. I don’t know that I’ll ever understand enough about the human condition to truly be able to appreciate how people can go about this life with the goal of hurting those around them. I don’t know if they do it because they delight in the actual act or if they do it in order to have the power…to have control. I wish I was stronger. I wish I didn’t feel things so deeply. I wish I was someone else…living someone else’s life.