Actual Email Conversation

Me: I wonder, once again, how us discussing weekend plans through email translates into fencing tools and garden tools for the Google Ad folks?

David: I get folding french doors, country french blueprints, and cool house plans.

Me: Sweet! The gods are telling us to go build a fence around a cool house in France!

David: We're going to be in France? I wonder if we can get somebody to put in a minefield for us?

Me: Maybe we can use the garden tools and do it ourselves.

Me: Wait. Did we just have a conversation through email about blowing up France? Because you KNOW Homeland Security is gonna be ALL over that.

David: Hey, it's OUR idea. If Homeland Security wants in on it, they should at least give us some credit.

Me: Whoa whoa whoa. It was YOUR idea. Hear that Omnipresent Government? I just wanted a vacation! I didn't wanna blow up France - HE did!